The holidays are here. You know how I know? Their events have taken over my calendar.
Tonight - Dallas Bar Construction Law Section Christmas Party. Thanks Marketing Girl at my office for not telling me about it until today, especially when it starts at 5:30. Do you think I pack a party dress in my purse? But I won't be able to go anyway because I got an email from my boss saying "I am going to be working on stuff late, and I need your help on it." So no party for me.
Tomorrow night - Tree Decorating Party at The Brothel. Shoulders and I thought about stringing popcorn to hang on the tree, but then we remembered the dogs would eat it. We thought about having people make ornamnets at the party, but then realized they would all end up looking like penises because thats what our friends do (namely one Vandy Boy).
Saturday night - Bar Crawl for Venus' Birthday organized by Venus' coworker. Not particularly a holiday party, but its cold outside, and in Texas that makes me think holiday. I will be drinking festively, and thats good enough for me.
Sunday night - Office Christmas Party. Seriously Office? A Sunday? Plan on getting no work out of me on Monday. You only have yourself to blame. Newly named Tech Guy is coming with me to the party. There will be a white elephant type gift exchange. My office is pretty unconservative, but I don't know if I can go with the 6X lace thong I took to a white elephant party last year. That may rub some of the larger coworkers the wrong way. Especially if they opened that bad boy up..how ironic would that be!
Monday night - Young Republican Christmas Party with Nouns and a friend of mine, Torchness, who used to work at my aforementioned office, and is now a fancy lawyer with an office with a window and everything. The last and first event we went to with this group was their monthly happy hour. Torchness scored a cute guy, I am hoping to acheive similar results at the Christmas Party. (Isn't that usually my mission for most things I do??) But on the fourth night of parties after three nights of heavy drinking, I don't like my chances.
Friday night - Texas Exes Board Christmas Party for which I got invited to after only having been on the board two weeks. Sweet deal. I also found out that our Christmas present is a case of beer for every member! Yeah, that's how we do it at Texas. So you know I won't be missing that party.
Robin laid an egg...
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