1. Because people don't like to be fat alone. That person is looking for a partner in next season's biggest loser, and it looks like they are trying to make it be you.
2. He knows the client is into that sort of thing. Don't worry he's a professional.
3. The person from #1.
4. Its never inappropriate to wear a chicken costume for Halloween, some just aren't ready for you yet.
5. No.
6. Take that back. If not, maybe its because I have become a mother?
7. Because you are too easily persueded, which is why #1.
8. Because you have to get ready at 7 am, and have the largest bladder in the world so you didn't have to pee until 2 pm.
9. No, you're not a terrible person. Go ahead and take him. I think Mr. Wonderful's dog needs to go to a more appropriate owner, ie anything without a penis.
10. There is no good reason for iTunes to do that to you. Don't they realize how crappy car trips are all alone in the backseat?
11. You stumped me on that one, none of my friends have boyfriends, and that's how I like it. Jerk-face is not really an insult.
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